23 March 2012 - A push within me

Chatting with friends, going to library to borrow books. It had changed my life. For the past few days, I am looking for the purpose of my life. For the past 6 months, I am just doing soul searching. Finally, I was enlighten only past few days.

Let's don't rack up the past. Move ahead! I borrow books on purpose. Purpose is not a goal. Purpose is how we want our life to be. Purpose is everything in our life. Purpose define our actions in making decision. As for goal, it is an achievements. Hence, it is different.

I was told about my purpose, and the initial purpose like wanting to be successful, earning lot of money, etc. It doesn't drive me. I don't feel anything special about it. But after reading through, I was inspired and understand it better. I finally understand what Anthony means. It what I had mentioned above.

My purpose is to share on the financial concepts that I had learnt to everyone I get to meet. Everyone are my friends. I treat them with utmost respects and diligently care. Whether they take my advise or not, I had play my part to share with them.

My goals are to meet at least 12 friends a weeks so I can keep sharing my knowledge and make it part of my life. Constantly update on necessary information so as to provide my friends with lastest and real time information. To be a tag man when my friends need a financial advice or needs.

I believe with my positive approach, my payout will be worth doing it. I am not doing sales, with my honesty I am sure to tell others I am here to share with you on our life reality. We as oneself should know how to protect. With the harmony of our inner self, it will help to bloom our economy.

I am on for this. Will you join me?

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2012 Chinese new year

Wishing everyone a fruitful and joyful years ahead. Get what you wish, fulfill what you dream!

I would like to share with you my team motto: Dream big, think small, start small, start now!

I am not sure how this coming year will be, but I am sure that I am lack of self motivation and discipline. How far can I go? I don't know. I believe I have alot supporters cheering me. Thank you!

I am sorry that I had disappoint you and you guys did not give up on me.

I always believed in every problem, there is always a solution. And my problem is myself. I need to change myself to be a better man. Be more hardworking, actively involved, discipline and positively motivated.

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I want to make full use of every minutes and seconds!

Who take the control? Yourself or the time? Now I am slowly gaining control of the time. I am building a large pail to hold the water. Now I am just using a leaf to hold whatever I can.

I had wasted my money and time for the past 4 to 5 months! I cannot take it! And now I foresee to spend another 2 to 3 months to start up my career. Should i? No matter how, I have to move on with YES! I should!

Why!? It is because I have not started working and not yet trying out and I just give up! I am not going to be this! And that's not me! What make me so upset is because I am afraid! Nah! Stupid excuse! The problem lied on me!
1) Focus- I wanted to study but was always prefer to work on other things when it is so instant. I saw my niece so cute, got attracted to her.
2) Discipline- When ever I want to start studying, I keep running around busy finding entertainment, just do not keep my ass still and take the book start studying.
3) Lack of company- Yes! I found a Kaki but seem like our plans is different. Wonder what he actually thinking.
4) Lack of linkage- I am unable to see in the normal business process and I do not link to anything that I am doing at home. If I go office, what they said might create a link for me to understand. Mmm.. Maybe I really should go office!
5) Sense of urgency!- I did sense it but do not know why I just don't want to push myself and see it a point! I got to gear up! Stop whinning! Start working!

Hopefully what I had key in today will come in handy! Everything is to put my first step out! And play by ear after that! I have to start sailing and I believe, 船到桥头之然值!

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15 November: 5th M9 test

Yahoo! I FAILED AGAIN
It is not the first paper that I took more than 4 times. M5 I managed to pass on the 5th. And now, M9 I have to take the sixth attempt.
I am not giving up. But guess I need a break from it.

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A wake up call

Wake up! Wake up!
Today I had spend a few hours studying and working on my project stuff. Eventually, I feel that I did not really study.
I always had a heavy heartfelt feeling about what I want to work as. It is also confusing and hard to explain feeling whenever thought of it.

Today, WeiDe actually said out a potion of what my heart is feeling which I keep escaping or avoiding it. I don't dare to face it.

When my friends or relatives asked me what am I doing now after my NS, I will tell them swimming instructor. Now also training to be a financial advisor. I am not confident with what I said. Afraid to say what I actually doing. There is fear in me. And I disappoint myself.

It is too late that I was not given a chance to work in Warren. But nevertheless, I need to get a job first to stable my financial first. Also, if I am manage to pass my test, I still have to find some job to cover my lost for the first few month of career first.

Anyway, thank you WeiDe for enlighten me.

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Things will never be forever

While I am waiting for WeiJie to pick me up from lakeside for coaching, I saw this old man keep shaking the bicycle rack which was newly build.
It is build so nicely and new but there will always someone itchy hand to destory it. It might not be what I see. But I believe if is not this old man, sure there will be someone doing it too. Hence, I am not surprise about stuff build by governmmet is spoiled.
Hope there will be more consider people in this world.

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A wonderful gathering with RSTA

Current situation I might be tipsy. But I am able to control my mind. I believe my mind power are quite strong.

Anyway, just dismissed from a Thailand pub. Drink quite alot and pretty fast. Before that, we had steamboat session at lai lai steamboat place. Didn't eat much as I don't feel like eating steamboat. It is a good reunion session after 4 months of ORD! Its bring back our 1 year 10 months days. But they key topic is always fishy and muscle!

It is a good catch up about our life. But ultimately, we do havr fun.

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A meaningful life failure!

Kenny Thank you

I am not trying to compare with Kenny. Instead I am actually envy about how he preceive his life! We actually finish off our conversion by saying "Wao! Enjoy life!"

We struggle to survive, we keep stressing about our goals! That too much for us to work on. And even to think of how to relax also make us feel trouble too! Hence, I was enlightened by Kenny to be carefree and enjoy life! No need to run just walk.

I actually failed my M9 test today. But I do not know why I feel nothing when I submit my result. And after leaving the room, my heart felt heavy. It is only I saw Kenny, I started to lighten myself. No hurry. No wonder. Just do it or not!

Therefore, I concluded that it is a meaningful failure to let me open my heart.

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人不可貌像，海水不可斗量

今天一早起床就想起那位帮我妈妈代体的女司就给了我这对成语。
后来，就想起伟德的遭遇。 真是令人害怕!
来! 让我从妈妈的事说起。那为女司看起来很热情又很会说话。而到了顾客的眼里，她的态度服务很差也没用心去服务顾客。搞得有些顾客也吓走了。
而伟德的遭遇真是人心难测。说到来也是多年的好朋友，公司一到了破落的时候那人赶紧逃之夭夭。流了一屁股宰而一走了之，真不付责任。

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Happy Children Day

Happy Children Day
I went to buy Set E from Mr bean at lakeside MRT. Subconsciously, I told the lady there, 我要zhu gu li! Said so confidently! And I reflected this and realize is 巧克力. Is read as qiao ke li! The one that I said was what my parent said when I was young. That was hilarious. Anyway, I am very happy to have my craving food for today breakfast.

While I am waiting for Lestes, I had my children present treat!

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23 September 2011 reflection

I feel like a loser!
Again failed to plan, planned to fail.
I had not completed what I wanted to work on. But I had did other things that I did not plan to. I am just feeling sad that I did not complete what I wanted to.

Started of with my day by looking after my unfriendly little girl. Then I brought MacDonald supreme breakfast to make me satisfy. With what? I don't know. Then back to my cove to entertain my cyber me! Basically, these are what I do daily now.

I realized that I had not make full use of my time. Cyber me had slow me from moving forwards. I spend entire time interacting with him instead of real life person! I neglected my family and forgo the fun with interacting with people! Now, got to know how to manage it! And today, I posted alot of motivation video and stories in here too! That was part of my happiness today!

Around 4pm, I ran to SAFRA Jurong and had a swim then ran back. While I resting for my lap swim, there is a incident happened! A man was struggling at the pool side and the life guard didn't hesitate to rescuse him. It is a complement! I am wondering people had help you and you didn't appreciate. On the other hand, when help wasn't available you just go complaint! That such a dirt! At that moment, I feel like going to the counter to complement the life guard for doing such a good deed. But I didn't! Cause I find it not relavent to me. What pull me to do it again is because I encounted the same problem and I would like to gain the pride of a life guard! Anyway, it's over.

Back home, I met Jun Yuan for dinner. Actually additional desert after meal from home. He is doing great! Well, I told him that I had put on hold for my financial line while I am trying to let go of my other activities. Additionally, I had spend more time with my family. Somehow, I feel it just an excuse! He said that I am lost! Am i? I realize I am finding my purpose of engaging in what I am doing. We had a short session but nevertheless, I am glad to meet up with friend that we had disperse from NS after ORD.

I came back home after the meet up, I realize that I am just finding reason and not striving hard for what I wish to! A wish can be fulfilled, a goal can be met, a dream can be pursued! What am I waiting for! Time wait for no man!

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Everyone can make a difference to anyone!

I saw this story and heard this story numerous times. Somehow energy die down and restart again in helping. But I do believe when we pick someone up (i.e. Starfish), we feel better too. Even I cannot help everyone, I believe I had made a difference in the one I pick up!  

Life is just like a cup of coffee

Before I watch this video, I read somewhere from 9.38 FM, Slice of life.
I am very please with this story. It really bring out the meaning of living in this world. Everyone of us really want to achieve what we want and we just neglect what around us that we also have to bring them along. Then somehow contradicting what we want and what we wish.
I lobe coffee is also because of this story. Let's enjoy the cup of coffee that we are having!

Problem!? No worries!

Problem!? No worries! 

Take a look at this video and follow what it shared. Solve your problem! Nothing is impossible! 

22 September 2011 reflection

No more luck! It is an excuse!
After thinking through about what i had did for the past weeks, again i did not add any value in my life. All was i depend on luck to drive me around. Therefore, taking this chance for me to spend time with my family. Overall, not that bad.

I went to swim for the past 2 days. I saw books was set up to sell and i went to look at it. Somehow, it created an interest in me! I thought of collecting old books and donate it to under privilege kids. Also, i want to buy books that inspired me to read. Then my thoughts start to wonder! Books that inspired me to read!!? It sparked my mind. So now i know why M5 does not give me the kind of inspiration! I need to look for it! I think i have to start picking up myself in reading le! No more luck! Is depend whether i want it anot.

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Taking a simple theory examination

This is my forth time taking M5 test already. While I am typing down my reflection, my heart keep giving me a heart pain kind of feeling. Why? The pain for failing the test? Somehow. The pain for spending money? Not really. The feeling for wasting my trip down for the test? No. The uncomfortable feeling for not giving 100% focus in it? AND THAT IS IT! 

I somehow know my answer. But is that the root of the whole problem? I keep questioning myself. I did try putting in my best to do mock questions on line and even paper. Isn't it enough? I think it is. My spend my time reading and highlighting not good? Cannot store in my brain? Indeed some only. 

During today test, I am so tie up by the few questions that I am unsure. I am confidently that out of 60 questions I can score, but the other questions, it is in a risk. From there, I start to feel low confident of myself. So after the test, I am feeling damn low. I can not forgive myself. Maybe it is just one mark more to reach 75 but I see myself end with a rush as I do not dare to look further. 

After the test, I do not wish to go back home. I just feel like finding someone to distress but I could not manage to find someone. With that draggy feeling, I went to boost my energy by eating burger king with the Hershey sundae pie! 

Career Path

I am always happy to share my career path journey. 

Before I officially ORD, I actually draw a concern to all my peers about my future. Most people will say to going to University to pursue a degree. Some will say Experience is more important. Therefore, they choose to work. Then, I ask them again. What kind of job you are looking for? Have you sent out your resume? "Don't have" is the common answer that I heard. 

But for me, I am so kiasu! One month before ORD, I had send out to various companies, mainly IT, HR, Financial industry. None of them replied expect Financial companies. 

"That is not what I want! Insurance!? No way!" But in the end, I ended up in Financial industry. 

I started off with interviews in other Financial Companies. It was to had a experience of a job interview. And, there was a day I came back home from interview and I saw my financial adviser. We had a chat and so randomly I told her, "Why not I join you!". It not out of desperate or I really like job. I feel that since there are so many financial interview that I go to, why not I work with someone that I know of. This is how I started. 

I went to meet my boss, It was a different encounter. Normally boss for interview will ask interviewee to tell them more about themselves. But my this boss, ask me more about what I needs and how I can use this job to fulfill what I wants. Well, someone told me that this is a tactic used by Financial company. For me, it does make sense. 

After meeting my boss, for the next 2 to 3 days, I have being following him. He is someone who is good in leverage on resources. Went to his other businesses and see how he train others. Contributing back to society and educating others is something that I make me look up to him!

In Financial industry, a financial adviser is very important! Educating the clients, helping them to manage their funds, and also providing a good services is what I believe we need to do! But not all advisers are like this! This is the saddest part! It will cause harm to others who they trust you to manage their finance.  And this is the reason why I do not choose to further pursue my interest of being a MOE teacher. As this show that the impact that will act on for others. 

For my boss, he is also care about not his clients, he concern his team clients. He enforce and emphasize to all his Financial advisers that we need to play our part to act on clients money. And also think about welfare and customer services that our team provide.  

With these learning and the nature of job, I believe I had make up my choice to walk down this path of life! 

19 days after ORD

Today, 24 August 2011. Finally I started to type my reflection. I just met up with Damien, Wen wei and Louis at pioneer mall so call supper. I am so happy that everyone got their stuff in place and well planned. On the other hand, I think I am still stuck somewhere in the forest bashing out to find a track so as to navigate myself again.

The situation now for me is like I already had a very strong sense of direction to the path that I suppose to go but there are route that also appear just right beside me and I am pretending that it is not there. And the route that I see now is not a show in my map. I keep insist to know that after bashing this thick path, I am able to see the route.

Now the question is... How thick!?
I think I had enlighten myself through this reflection.

Anyway, I had good time talking to my fellow army friends. It is so nice to see them after 20 days of ORD. They are busy mugging their study and I am here keep worrying about my future.

Keep on going! Life is full of challenges!

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I feel the pain.

What happen to your family when you have health problem? How worried are they towards you? They will be so worried till affected their daily routine. If they don't, this might be the reason why you are lack of family love.

I remember there was once I had gastric problem and I was in a very painful and disperse for cure situation. I had just taken the medication that was given by doctor. But that does not help. I could only scream and shout to ignore the pain. While I am doing it, people around me were just crying in their heart, feel the pain for me. I am so selfish and keep inisist that they do not understand how I am feeling.

And now, my mum was feeling pain and she did not show it. And not later, my siblings told me that she need to go for minor operation. As a child of hers, I started to feel worried. Eventhough I dun physically see her pain but I can feel her worried and fear. On the other hand, my dad also feel burden with the problem.

Now my family face difficulities, as a son what can I do? I am not financial stable and I still rely on them alot. I am workaholic keep busying outside activities. And this time round, I have to contribute back and start to take up responsibilities. Well, these are just my anger words. But putting into reality is something I need to work on.

What have I done??

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A new route found

I have being sourcing for my future path after my ORD. Sending my resume to companies, sign up for job portal, and asking around were method I use to hunt for a job. I started looking for job cause I am unsure with what I want in life. Looking back at what Terrence had asked me, I am just avoiding his question and hiding from reality.

I do not know what to study but I just do not want to waste time just to study which in fact make me delay in applying. And now, I was recommended by my financial advisor, Chye hong to join her team.

Chye hong team is lead by the top sale personnal, Anthony. The team name is 正. The meaning for this chinese name is to act as a reminder for all members to do the right thing. There is a very disciplinary culture in the team which is a good and professional way of doing as a financial advisor. Anthony lead the team with direction and he gave me a impression that nothing is impossible.

And, I am going to be part of the team! I believe in this team, I believe in the culture and I believe in Anthony. After interacting with Anthony, I have a more visionary path that I am heading now. How far is my route or how tough is my path, I can do it.

Being a financial advisor was not what I planned to do. But life change, opportunities come and go. I choose to take up this chance and I shall look ahead and move on.

Shall see me grow!

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